Alone for Christmas
by ilovetvalot
Summary: What happens when two lonely souls are alone for Christmas? JJ/Hotch - TWOSHOT
1. Chapter 1

_**Author's Note:**_

_**Just a reminder, December 25th is right around the corner. Everyone that signed up for the CM Christmas Fic Exchange, please remember your stories. We want this to be a WONDERFUL gift experience for all involved. If you have any questions, feel free to pm either myself (ilovetvalot) or tonnie2001969.**_

_**In other forum news, please check out our newest discussion thread, "Serious vs. Light - Which gets the most response?" It is a discussion of serious vs light stories and the response they get from readers. We also have new interviews with Clarebones and musicxlife4 up for your reading pleasure.**_

_**Also please check out the discussion thread entitled, "The Fine Line Between T and M ratings". There's a great ongoing discussion there, too.**_

_**Finally, if any of you have any idea for issues/activities that you'd like to see "Chit Chat on Author's Corner" forum tackle in the form of discussion threads and/or challenges, please let us know. We want to bring you all some really fun threads in the New Year!**_

_**As always, thank you to every reader, reviewer, favoriter, and alerter that enjoys our stories. Hearing from each of you means a great deal. Now, on with our story!**_

* * *

**Alone For Christmas**

**Chapter One**

Staring morosely at the twinkling tree in front of her, JJ felt the hollow emptiness spreading inside her, eating away at her very soul. She needed her child. Her baby.

Normally, sharing custody of her toddler son wasn't a trial. Normally, she used the time that her precious baby boy was with his father to clean...to take a soak in a bubble bath and decompress...to read a book.

But, not today.

Not on Christmas Eve.

True, she'd have him back tomorrow at noon, which was only a few hours away. She'd still be allowed to share the holiday with him, to see his smiling face and hear his happy giggles. But it wasn't the same. For the first time ever, she wouldn't see that wide eyed look on his amazed two year old face when he awoke.

And for that, she could happily hate Will LaMontagne.

Sighing again as she turned to stare out the window of her small but cozy brownstone, she noted the fogged glass, a clear indicator of the disparity in temperature between her warm living room and the frigid winter outside the glass. Damn, she hoped Will remembered to turn the heat up in his apartment. Hopefully, his newest flavor of the week was cold natured and would at least try to look out for her son.

Leaning her head back against the couch, JJ closed her eyes. What had happened to the days when she'd cherished her solitude? Her independence? When had she become this person that hated the silence an empty house held? No one that hadn't been through it could understand how painful the stillness could be. How the hush only amplified the thoughts inside your mind...how it made you question and reexamine every decision you'd ever made in your life.

How it made you miss the one bright and shining light that dispelled the darkness.

Choking out an irritated moan, JJ shot to her feet, her toes clenching against the thick rug. She couldn't stay here...trapped in the silence with only her psyche for company. Screw that.

Grabbing her coat from the rack by the door, she slung her purse over her shoulder as she slipped her feet into her loafers. It was Christmas Eve. There had to be a crowd somewhere in D.C. she could lose herself in.

And try not to think about everything missing from her life.

**/XXX/**

Pacing his small apartment for the fourth time in a half hour, Aaron Hotchner realized the restlessness that had plagued him since he'd seen Jack off at Haley's parents' home had no intention of ebbing. Evidently, those feelings had taken a permanent address in his soul, determined to set up camp for the coming holidays.

He knew allowing Jack to spend Christmas Eve with Haley's family had been the right decision. After all, had she been alive, that's what the boy would have been doing anyway; the Brooks' familial get together was a longstanding ritual. One that he didn't want to be responsible for altering, wanting his son to have memories that weren't tainted with sorrow and fears.

True, he'd been invited, and he'd actually been tempted to accept, if only to spend some time with his son. But in the end, he knew it was an offer extended as a politeness, not out of a genuine desire to have him present for the festivities. The hard feelings regarding his marriage's demise were still very real, even two years after Haley's passing.

So, here he paced, hallway to hallway, room to room. Alone in his apartment. Rapidly driving himself crazy with his own less than stellar company.

Damn, but he missed being married. Having a person to share his life with. This solitary existence he'd immersed himself in was fine when he had his son to occupy his mind and body. But, in these rare moments of freedom, he realized that solitude and introspection weren't all they were cracked up to be.

Honestly, it was sad. He was a man in his prime with a good job and a wonderful son. Yet, he was alone.

It's not as if you put yourself out there, Aaron. You actually would have to leave the apartment to meet someone. Besides, playing the poor pitiful me card isn't exactly in your character, his mind chided him.

It was true, though. Other than his professional relationships, he rarely interacted with anyone other than his son. Once burned, twice shy, and all that. Tonight, though, he'd give anything for a little company. Just a few words shared between friends.

Turning sharply, he quickly reached for his jacket from the back of the nearby chair. There was only one cure he could think of for when the walls began to close in on him.

Escape.

**/XXX/**

Smiling as a giggling child darted past her, running toward the live nativity scene on display in the city park she strolled in, JJ sighed. It wouldn't be long and her son would be that child. Already independent, her little boy was rapidly displaying marked signs of a stubborn streak to rival her own. Soon, she knew, she'd be that parent now rushing past her to catch up to her wayward laughing child, her face frazzled and her energy at end.

And while a part of her couldn't wait for that day, another smaller portion of her mourned Henry's rapidly diminishing "babyhood". While the last year since she'd left the BAU had been fraught with unexpected changes, she couldn't deny that one of the few benefits of her career change had been the fact that she'd gotten to experience more parenting joys than she would have as media liaison for the BAU.

She still missed her "family", but knowing that she'd improved as a mother helped take the sting out of the transition. Well, at least until she lived through nights like this.

As if her thoughts of the BAU could conjure a representative of their motley crew, JJ's face brightened as she caught sight of her former Unit Chief coming toward her through the milling crowd. "Hotch!" she called when he would have turned to the right. "Hotch?" she shouted again above the laughter and gaiety of the Christmas throng.

Maybe her Christmas Eve was about to change for the better after all.


	2. Chapter 2

_**Author's Note:**_

_**Just a reminder, December 25th is right around the corner. Everyone that signed up for the CM Christmas Fic Exchange, please remember your stories. We want this to be a WONDERFUL gift experience for all involved. If you have any questions, feel free to pm either myself (ilovetvalot) or tonnie2001969.**_

_**In other forum news, please check out our newest discussion thread, "Serious vs. Light - Which gets the most response?" It is a discussion of serious vs. light stories and the response they get from readers. We also have new interviews with Clarebones and musicxlife4 up for your reading pleasure.**_

_**Also please check out the discussion thread entitled, "The Fine Line Between T and M ratings". There's a great ongoing discussion there, too.**_

_**Finally, if any of you have any idea for issues/activities that you'd like to see "Chit Chat on Author's Corner" forum tackle in the form of discussion threads and/or challenges, please let us know. We want to bring you all some really fun threads in the New Year!**_

_**As always, thank you to every reader, reviewer, and person that favorites or alerts one of our stories. Hearing from each of you means a great deal to each of us. We truly value your thoughts and opinions. Now, on with our story!**_

* * *

**Alone for Christmas**

**Chapter Two**

Hearing his name, Hotch jerked his head up, looking around the busy park. Turning around as he heard a familiar feminine voice shout his name again, Hotch's eyes widened as he saw JJ waving at him. "JJ?" Hotch smiled, walking toward his former employee. "How are you?" he asked, exchanging a hug with the diminutive blonde.

"Well, it's Christmas Eve, Will has my son until noon tomorrow, and I'm walking aimlessly through a city park," JJ laughed at herself as she found herself reverting to the typical blunt honesty she'd always shared with her former boss. "Uhmm...I've had better Christmases. You?" she asked, stepping toward him as a group of jostling teenagers ambled past.

"Much the same," Hotch chuckled, tightening his jacket around his waist as a gust of wind blew. "Jack's with Haley's family until tomorrow, too," he admitted. "It felt odd to be at home without him."

"Believe me," JJ nodded, stepped to the side as they moved out of the way of the crowd. "I can sympathize."

"JJ," Hotch said seriously, resting a hand against her arm, "I was really sorry to hear about you and Will. Garcia told us."

Shrugging her slim shoulders, JJ forced the same brave smile she'd been using for months to her lips. "I'm fine, Hotch," she replied, sticking to the party line she had memorized and come to believe as true.

Raising an eyebrow as his dark eyes bored into hers, Hotch said dryly, "Do I need to refresh your memory on what I do for a living?"

Shifting guiltily on her feet, well aware of his ability to literally read minds, JJ shook her head ruefully. "Forgive me. I forgot who I was talking to for a moment," she chuckled, a faint blush filling her cheeks.

"You know," Hotch said as a cold wind blew over them, ruffling her hair, "I'm here if you ever need to purge. You might not remember, but I have a bit of experience in this area," he mocked lightly.

Looking up at him for a long moment, JJ nodded. "I might have to take you up on that," she said, shivering a bit as the wind kicked up again. "Got about two weeks free on your agenda?"

"No," Hotch shook his head as he pretended to look at his watch, his eyes twinkling. "But I do have about fourteen hours."

Lips twitching at his dry humor, JJ nodded. "My place is closer. Coffee?"

"That sounds like the best offer I've had all day, JJ," Hotch smiled, his outlook suddenly brightening in spite of the night skies.

**/XXX/**

"...so, after the second woman, I knew it was pointless. One indiscretion, I might have been able to get past. But two..."

Hotch nodded sagely as he watched JJ's face interestedly. "Ah, yes. Fool me once, shame on you, but fool me twice..."

"...shame on me," JJ nodded as she finished his sentence, lifting her coffee cup to her lips as she curled her feet beneath her on the couch. "The funny thing is, I don't miss him," she frowned, perplexed, her forehead furrowing as she let out a sigh. "I really don't. I just miss being part of..."

"...an us," Hotch supplied meaningfully, his own earlier feelings coming to the surface once again. "I know what you mean. Haley and I, between the dating, engagement and marriage, were together for over twenty years when she left me. I didn't know the first thing about being single. Hell, we'd been together since high school, JJ. This world," he said, gesturing toward the nearby window, "was like an alien planet. Absolutely nothing was done in the same way."

Smiling slightly as she listened to his deep voice, JJ eyed the man beside her on the couch. "It wasn't that bad, was it?"

"No," Hotch snorted, arching a brow as he sipped at his coffee. "It was worse. The last date I went on was set up by Rossi," Hotch informed her, shaking his dark head. "Do the math."

"Oh, God," JJ laughed, well aware of Dave's wide and varied tastes in women, the older agent's reputation an ingrained part of the Bureau's fabled history. "Socialite or stripper?" she deadpanned.

"Neither," Hotch grimaced. "The bastard set me up with ex-wife number two," Hotch shuddered, recalling the painful evening vividly. Between the long tense silences, he and the former Mrs. Rossi had discussed the only topic on which they'd both been fluent.

Dave.

Giggling, JJ choked on her coffee as she reached for a napkin. "You're kidding, right?"

"Not in the slightest. It seems that our mutual friend thought I'd have worlds in common with the terror that was his former wife," Hotch grumbled, shifting against the small pillow as he settled deeper into the corner of JJ's comfortable sofa.

"What was his real motive?" JJ asked perceptively.

"She was in his words supposed to be an "incredibly easy lay"," Hotch said, doing his best Rossi impression, including the well known Rossi eyebrow wiggle. "Trust me, all I heard for weeks was an outraged 'How could you screw that up, Aaron?'"

Shaking her head, JJ dropped her head back against the couch. "God, I miss you guys," she sighed, turning her head to look at him, letting her eyes linger on his strong jaw and his solid presence.

"We miss you, too," Hotch replied truthfully, meeting her cerulean blue eyes.

"I never meant to let so much time pass between visits," JJ apologized, shrugging her shoulders as she tried to count the actual days since she had seen her former team. "Between the split with Will and the new job and taking care of Henry..."

"Time has a way of slipping away from us," Hotch agreed, smiling in understanding. "Believe me, JJ, I understand. Let's just not let it go so long again."

"I won't," JJ smiled before they lapsed into companionable silence for a few moments watching as the television began the midnight Mass broadcast. Laughing quietly, she cast her guest a sidelong glance. "Did you ever think ten years ago that you'd be alone for Christmas, Hotch?"

Dropping a hand to cover hers, letting his fingers twine with hers, Hotch shook his head. "No, I didn't. But you know what? I do believe I'd rather be alone for Christmas with a friend like you than anybody else on earth."

Nodding, JJ silently agreed as she turned her hand, settling her palm against his strong touch. Luckily for her, being alone for Christmas wasn't quite as lonely as she thought it would be.

_**Finis**_


End file.
